not easy being a Mummy!

It's really not an easy task being a Mummy! kids nowadays are so smart... they know when they should give you their stunts to agitate you and know when to show you their pitiful face or ignorant look like they really don't know about it.. *Gosh! i almost go crazy these few days... after my nagging, lectures, canning, scoldings... my Baby still lack of motivation... he used to be initiative in his schwork.. used to be alert.. used to be obedient.. but now, he will answer back to mi... will challenge mi his knowledge... will demand..no-no.. i should say request pressie for any occasion... tell mi lies to cover his wrongdoings... secretly exchange messages in sch or with his Daddy not letting mi know what he's up to... i must admit i did not spend enough time with him... but i did try my best to teach him the right things.. i know i am still harsh with my words... especially when im angry with him! honestly, i really don't mean to and i wish i can shower the same kind of lubb like how Laura to Melody and Ting to Jadon... and Mag to all her nieces and Joven... *sigh sometimes, i do need his Daddy's understanding... my tone may sound unfriendly to him but seriously i do not mean anything at all... i don't like him to misinterpret my intention and always assume that im finding fault at him! its NOT TRUE... im also tired and im very sick of quarrels.. sick of his banging and shouting... most important, i don't wish Baby to follow suit. i wish Brandon will be a calm boy who like to socialise and be open-minded.. not to be a self-centered person who easily get jealous over MeiMei Angel... i want him to learn to be generous with things and share with her... I do not know what has happened to Baby when i was not around that whole week.. i just find him slacken in his schwork.. his attitude turns terrible and he get impatient most time... especially with his Ma-Ma... i wish i can help him... maybe i should stand in his shoes and think about why he has such reactions lately... yes, i know there will be more to come and im still learning... learning how to control my temper.. learning how to give him more attention.. learning how to use my words wisely by not hurting him... i will try my best!

Its my Baby Bday!!!

missing my baby

Its been more than 10 days i did not see my Baby... i miss him alot! I start to wonder, has he ever miss mi or thought of mi? I leave him at my Mum's place under quarantine due to that stupid H1N1. I just flew back from Philippines and i dun wish to affect his studies. I just saw he has 2 competition to attend - English and Maths in July and August respectively. Think his school put too much pressure on these kids nowadays. This Friday gonna be Baby's 8th yr birthday. We got a surprise for him! Its his favourite most wanted thing... it took me to consider quite awhile before i decided to buy it. He has no idea what is his pressie... but he requested for 'goodies bag' to all his classmates.. i rejected him! I dun want to let him have this habit of giving out 'goodies bag' every yr.. this is unnecessary and its not an obligation that i have to do what he want all the time. I told my sis we shall celebrate his birthday at Mum's place this Friday. I shall go buy a cake and surprise him wif all his fav stuffs... *kekeke... looking forward to it... mmm... i miss him!

A Letter from Brandon

The letter that Baby just gave me wrote: Dear Mummy and Daddy Today, I can't even enjoy myself for just one minute. And my start all so bad. (a balloon inside wrote- boring) I wish I could start everything again. (drawing of a sad face) I just want to have fine day & good rest. And I want to sleep but I can't just because of you this Mummy and Daddy! (P.S. sorry for say that) Oh, and I just don't know when I can get a DS lite. Because my dream is to have a free DS lite. I really don't know what to do so I write all the things in these papers. And you all keep scolding me until I'm all so frustrated. Love, Brandon I have a mixture feeling right now. disappointed + heart-break cos of the impression that he has of 'Mummy & Daddy'... but from another angle, I am happy that he opened up himself to us what has been going on in his mind. He is still after all a kid... I can't blame him for having such thoughts but I must correct him. I asked, if I do according to his request.. no more scolding... exchange yearly trip for a DS lite, will he agree to this arrangement?! He quickly keep saying 'No-No-No'!!! I relay to him my feelings after reading this letter. I've also explained why and how he can be better... I want him to be an understanding boy and not the grouchy one who always think this unfair that unfair. I told him about my mum's health condition and his YeYe's condition... I told him about how tedious and stressful it is for Mummy and Daddy to be working so hard in order to provide what we can for him. Sometime, kids only see the surface things and all along, they will think that we adults are loaded with money. And we will give them whatever they request... They don't understand our job... our worries... our sacrifices.. Its a good thing cos at least I have a chance to explain to him our situation. Economic downturn has really badly hit us! The moment we get pay, we pay our outstanding bills at one go.. left with S$200-S$300 to spend for the whole month. I was in a bad financial crisis now but still manageable.. struggling to stay afloat otherwise we gonna really be in a bad state!!!! Buying a HDB home is so expensive.. It 's a lifetime commitment that we can't get out and we cannot live without! By another 3yrs time, I hope I can get a house of my own with Baby... just the thought of us both staying together in a new house makes me smile. =) ok enough folks! I am tired and drowsy after taking my medicine... gdnight